Public Restrooms

So today I’m just minding my own business at work and all of a sudden that Russian Reuban isn’t sitting too hot. Now lets face it…..when you go out or are at work you don’t want to take a shit. I prefer what I call a “pleasure shit”. This is when you pull out your favorite magazine and just get to relax the shit away. But anyways back to topic. Well I decided there was no holding it for that last hour and slowly waddled my way to the bathroom. Guess I’d been brewing up something special and that bastard was huge. I mean theres bass fishermen that would have been proud to have that SOB on the end of their line. So the uh oh hits me. I have this problem where everytime I take a dump in public I manage to clog a toilet. Normally I couldn’t give a crap (pun intended) but I was at work and its generally a rule of thumb to not completely destroy your only bathroom. A prayer to God could be heard when that second flush sent that bad boy away instead of flooding over the john. So my question is…………Why do public toilets suck? I mean I understand this saving water stuff with the high efficiancy toilets but NO ONE takes a public shit unless its a monster. I personally vote for Mens bathrooms to have high flow cans. It would avoid constant overflows, clogs, and quite frankly I just like the wind rushing over my ass when I flush a fucking monster shitcan. Women don’t take shits in my mind anyways so fuck them. They can sit on one of these toy shitters that you see and I will sit on my 42 gallon throne.

Ps: go hug a tree